It isn't, as they say, done.
Dec. 16th, 2018 10:48 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
expatgirl OMG, y'all I completed one piece of writing this year. I've said this on other platforms, but I can't quite get over it!
Granted I was a.) grappling with anxiety disorder and medication side effects b.) managing a team for a UK government service (for literally no extra money, whee!) c.) moving to another country but still.
I have, in fact, done a fair amount of writing--Liberty Bonds stands at 38k words, and is just over the halfway point; and of course, there's Eurydice Rising, which is complete and is also the the most controversial fic I've written, percentage-wise (wow, MCU fandom).
I've started some original things--a selkie femslash story, a space-rescue femslash story, and, for some reason, a story about a pirate and an angel having a baby together. Whether I'll finish any of those, or, indeed anything, in 2019 is uncertain. And What Comes After took me 2 years to complete, after all. (My poor unpopular kid! They don't love you like I love you.)
My goal last year was to divorce myself from my writing, to make my sense of self less dependent on it and how others reacted to it. I think I've accomplished that, but I also wonder if I've gone too far. I'm good, after all, at severing myself from things, having had a lifetime of practice. I'm less tangled up, but I also get no pleasure from anything I've written, because I make a point of not revisiting anything and, if I do it's as though a stranger has written it.
So maybe this year I need to go the other way, a little bit. I'm not sure how to do that, but I guess I've got a year to find out.
Granted I was a.) grappling with anxiety disorder and medication side effects b.) managing a team for a UK government service (for literally no extra money, whee!) c.) moving to another country but still.
I have, in fact, done a fair amount of writing--Liberty Bonds stands at 38k words, and is just over the halfway point; and of course, there's Eurydice Rising, which is complete and is also the the most controversial fic I've written, percentage-wise (wow, MCU fandom).
I've started some original things--a selkie femslash story, a space-rescue femslash story, and, for some reason, a story about a pirate and an angel having a baby together. Whether I'll finish any of those, or, indeed anything, in 2019 is uncertain. And What Comes After took me 2 years to complete, after all. (My poor unpopular kid! They don't love you like I love you.)
My goal last year was to divorce myself from my writing, to make my sense of self less dependent on it and how others reacted to it. I think I've accomplished that, but I also wonder if I've gone too far. I'm good, after all, at severing myself from things, having had a lifetime of practice. I'm less tangled up, but I also get no pleasure from anything I've written, because I make a point of not revisiting anything and, if I do it's as though a stranger has written it.
So maybe this year I need to go the other way, a little bit. I'm not sure how to do that, but I guess I've got a year to find out.
Oh, and I guess my other goal is: Finish something for god's sake.
