expatgirl: a roy lichtenstein style POW drawing (pow!)
 It's been 84 years, but I've done it. I've updated Liberty Bonds

When I started writing the chapter I lived in England. Now I don't. In the interim I've had health problems and.....other things going on. It's a miracle it exists at all! (Though to be honest, that can be said of literally anything I write. Writing, for me, is about as easy as performing surgery on myself.) 

Here's an excerpt from "Dear Old Pal of Mine", which is chapter 8:

A darkly bristling presence brushed by Dean’s leg, leaving a trail of brimstone in his nose. The Hellhound. He quenched the desire to slit its throat. He had to keep eyes on the demon in front of him, the one wearing that shifty-looking meat suit and conspicuously expensive cravat. He heard a heavy wuff as the Hellhound settled at the base of the throne, causing a tremor to travel through the floor.

“Good girl, Juliet,” the demon—Crowley—said in a gentle voice. It made Dean’s skin crawl.  Maybe it was the atmosphere in this place, or the smell, or something else Dean couldn’t define, but a memory threatened to climb up out of his throat in the form of a scream. All at once he heard Alistair (a name he hadn’t said to anyone, not even himself, in years) crooning similar words in a similar tone into his ear.

“Do pay attention,” Crowley said, sounding bored, as he stepped onto the dais and sat.

Dean raised his eyebrows. “Trust me, you got every ounce of me and my knife’s attention.”

Crowley smiled at that. “Kurdish, is it? Very rare. I saw you, ah, fondling it.”

“Cut the crap,” Dean said. “You said you had intel?”

Crowley made a show of examining his fingernails. “I said I’d like to make a deal. It’s kind of my forte.”

Dean stepped forward, and a quiet growl rose up from the ground. “You said yourself, I’ve dealt with some of your thugs before. You know how well that ended for them.”

“Mm,” Crowley said, nodding, still smiling. “I also know how well it ended for you.”

Dean smiled back, the kind of smile he’d learned in Hell, and the Hound at Crowley’s feet grew quiet. “Yeah, how did that end? Oh, wait. With me topside and them dead.”

Crowley turned serious. “Don’t try my patience.”

“Tell me what you want, and I’ll tell you how many pieces I’m gonna carve you into.”

Crowley rolled his eyes. “There’s no rack in Hell as torturous as the grammar you just used on me.” He sighed. “But fine.” He stepped down from the throne and walked toward Dean. “As I said: you keep the celestials out of my hair, even the, hm, charismatic one, and I’ll tell you who’s after Juliet here.”

You can read from the beginning here.
Tags and Warnings: Dean/Cas, minor Dean/others, minor Sam/Jess, Sam/Eileen; World War I, angels, blood, trench warfare. Rated M.

 


I-V

Jan. 10th, 2019 09:30 pm
expatgirl: an abstract digital collage of a light blue background, with a dark blue strip below it. This represents the sky over the ocean on a clear day. (Default)
I.

I'm trying to make the most of my unemployed hours--which assumes, of course that they may be coming to and end--but the fact of the matter is that I like doing very little. I like making tea and sitting on the floor and drinking it over the course of an hour. I like scrolling through Twitter hashtags but not posting much on Twitter (10 years on that particular hellsite, wow). I like rolling around in the glitter and the filth in my head and putting some of that down on paper (well, Google docs), without much push to finish anything.*

II.

 I wanna write about a pirate and an angel having a baby. So I do, for no one but me and a couple of other people.

III.

One no longer has a room of one's own but one is accustomed to be being sly and quiet with one's work, and even more so with one's leisure. 

IV.

Mostly Tumblr was an awful place, but there were good things about it--people I met there which I wouldn't have been able to meet anywhere else. And yes, porn. I miss it for a few reasons but a big one the fact that most pornography is GODAWFUL and curating it is a skill that takes time and and dedication. The other reason is that, you know, my limit for engaging with that particular kind of material is about 20 minutes, tops. Being able to spend 10 minutes on an exquisitely curated queer porn blog and then turn my attention to other things on the same platform was extremely refreshing! 

V.

*I really really do need to finish my WW1 Destiel AU fic. Like REALLY. 
expatgirl: a pen and ink drawing of an owl with big gold eyes (owl)
 Three years ago today, I posted The Orange Blossom Bride! 
It's a 15k word, Dean/Cas case fic, and it's a creepy Florida twist on the old Legend of the Mistletoe Bough.

But what you may not have known about this particular fic is that I got the idea from a real photograph...Read more... )

expatgirl: an abstract digital collage of a light blue background, with a dark blue strip below it. This represents the sky over the ocean on a clear day. (Default)
 OMG, y'all I completed one piece of writing this year. I've said this on other platforms, but I can't quite get over it!

Granted I was a.) grappling with anxiety disorder and medication side effects b.) managing a team for a UK government service (for literally no extra money, whee!) c.) moving to another country but still.

I have, in fact, done a fair amount of writing--Liberty Bonds stands at 38k words, and is just over the halfway point; and of course, there's Eurydice Rising, which is complete and is also the the most controversial fic I've written, percentage-wise (wow, MCU fandom). 

I've started some original things--a selkie femslash story, a space-rescue femslash story, and, for some reason, a story about a pirate and an angel having a baby together. Whether I'll finish any of those, or, indeed anything, in 2019 is uncertain. And What Comes After took me 2 years to complete, after all. (My poor unpopular kid! They don't love you like I love you.)

My goal last year was to divorce myself from my writing, to make my sense of self less dependent on it and how others reacted to it. I think I've accomplished that, but I also wonder if I've gone too far. I'm good, after all, at severing myself from things, having had a lifetime of practice. I'm less tangled up, but I also get no pleasure from anything I've written, because I make a point of not revisiting anything and, if I do it's as though a stranger has written it. 

So maybe this year I need to go the other way, a little bit. I'm not sure how to do that, but I guess I've got a year to find out. 

Oh, and I guess my other goal is: Finish something for god's sake. 


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